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Friday, January 29, 2010
Those ugly beings...
I cant breathe clean...nasty nasty...my hungry lungs...i suffocate..i'm claustrophobic...i pant and suck in air greedily...don’t close the door…I want in…its my room…I need space…get the fuck out…just leave me alone…just LEAVE ME ALONE…go away go away go the HELLL away…I want to scream…go away go away…love hate beauty ugly fat cold…oh soooooooooo cooldd coooooooooold….frozen…dirty…crawling all over my skin…grease…I hate you I hate you…how dare you…why do you get to say all those things…and why don’t i…I hate you…you talk you think its okay to say whatever u want wherever you want…and must listen and pretend I don’t hear…I see you everywhere you bastard I hate you I hate you…you are ugly ugly ugly…rotten black goo…powerless weasel snivelling…and I must see you everywhere…man man man…everywhere man…the arrogance…you stink of it…don’t go alone don’t go alone…its not safe…I wanna scream and cry and thrash and hurt and skin and tear and claw…
I’m me I’m me I’m ME…leave me be…I want space…I need air…I need space to run and be and breathe and think and laugh and dance and gaze and love…midnight…biking…freedom…wind..cold cold air…waking up the rage…the anger...the thrill...the mad in me…do you want to be raped…oh mi god she is a slut…look at her clothes…rolling eyes...whispers...sleaze...dizziness...cold cooooooooooooldd…hands...warmth...dirtiness...eyes…oh those eyes that are everywhere...watching watching...always watching…smirking…SEEING...wondering…those eyes that I claw out..,claw and poke…and slap and kick and make you SHUT THE HELL UP…forever…just shut up shut up shut up shut up…I don’t wanna hear anymore…my life my life…its MY LIFE…I don’t need anything anyone…stupid…playing games…why why why why why...my completeness accept…my power my beauty my wholeness…always stepping crushing belittling stamping laughing touching groping feeling breaking spoiling stopping waiting scheming playing…dirty dirty dirty…power…I hate you…disappear…soft and sweet and fragrant mystery…shatter…probing, prodding…plane…angles…squares and circles...away away away…don’t meet…don’t meet...judging always judging…façade…cool cool closed scheming façade…that mask covering your ugly thoughts...cut it off...piece by piece…I hate you
Friday, January 8, 2010
Wildfire in AP
Disclaimer: This is purely MY very very objective exploration of MY conjectures. It is NOT my intent to proliferate any rumours that might aggravate any situation.
Just as the Telangana issue seems to be cooling down in the state, a new issue has suddenly cropped up. TV 5/TV 9 and other 'local' news channels have started reporting news from a suspect source (A Russian magazine 'The Exile(d)) that the Ambani brothers are behind YSR's death, which was in actuality, not an accident but a pre-meditated murder. Rumours are flying about that the pilot of the helicopter was bribed or his family was bribed or something...
Incidentally, believe it or not, I was discussing a theory with a few people before this news came out...and I'm quite convinced that YSR's death wasnt an accident. Only, one of the ppl I was discussing this with said..."You actually believe that somebody bribed the pilot and convinced him to COMMIT SUICIDE?"...I was, of course, speechless and mortified. But it COULD happen, right? Maybe I've been watching too many conspiracy movies...but YSR's sudden death DID seem very OUT OF THE BLUE...yea, u skeptics might ask say..."It was an accident, for heaven's sake!"...and I have no answer to that...except...call it a hunch or a woman's intuition or what have u....but do you remember the coverage? It was quite vague...and a minor glitch turned overnight into a tragedy for the state. YSR was supposedly just stranded somewhere...and the next minute, we find out that hez dead!
Then, the making of a martyr begins...blah blah...tussle for CMship between Rosayya and Jagan...and once thatz settled...our noseman, KCR starts fasting...and voila! Fuck up at the centre and the state starts burning. I donno how many of you noticed this, but everything happened quite suddenly in a span of 3 months...one after the other. I havent looked it up, but I heard from loadsa other ppl that KCR did try the fasting trick earlier and no one really bothered...WHY NOW? And a looooooooot of resigning and party-badlofying by all those ministers...jokes about Naidu and KCR NOT expecting an okay from the centre...criticism against Sonia and Chidambaram for being too hasty...and after all this hullabulloo....and now, strong signs of a 'NO' to Telangana from the centre!
And just as that was about to START cooling down, MAYBE....THIS! More property damage and a call for a bandh 2moro. Demands to know about the black box in the chopper...or the voice recording...apparently YSR and pilot in a verbal tussle before death...more rumours and hype. The supposed 'public' (read paid goons) resort to violence and an already volatile situation flares up even more. I'm sure 2moro's news will be full of refutations from the Ambanis...and then, some fart will call for a probe in the state...coz obviously somebody from the state was involved. All the big shots will be implied...I can only think of KCR, Naidu and OBVIOUSLY Jagan himself (my gawd, the sympathy right now could easily win him the CMship). Then, the real mystery will never unfold but fact upon fabricated fact will sensationalize the news even more...and eventually it'll die down...there might be a split and there might be a new CM...or not...but one things for SURE! It'll take the state AGES to recover. Before 2day's new addition, the state has already incurred a loss of 3000+ crores...or so I heard. Hyd is the worst hit, with MNCs and potential foreign investors taking their business elsewhere.
And ultimately, even if the Ambanis are really implicated in the issue...they are definitely going scot free...and once things have calmed down, they'll cover up the losses incurred in the state. The ones who are going to suffer, again, are the common people. Mostly, the lower-end workers in reliance establishments and to a slightly lesser extent, other reliance employees.
Ironically, it is the students who suffer the most in all this. Hotblooded, yes...but that doesnt have to make us stupid. These are all games played by bigshots to mint money...and we, who depend on jobs for our daily bread can hardly afford police records. Wake up, dammit...and please stop ruining public property!!!
Just as the Telangana issue seems to be cooling down in the state, a new issue has suddenly cropped up. TV 5/TV 9 and other 'local' news channels have started reporting news from a suspect source (A Russian magazine 'The Exile(d)) that the Ambani brothers are behind YSR's death, which was in actuality, not an accident but a pre-meditated murder. Rumours are flying about that the pilot of the helicopter was bribed or his family was bribed or something...
Incidentally, believe it or not, I was discussing a theory with a few people before this news came out...and I'm quite convinced that YSR's death wasnt an accident. Only, one of the ppl I was discussing this with said..."You actually believe that somebody bribed the pilot and convinced him to COMMIT SUICIDE?"...I was, of course, speechless and mortified. But it COULD happen, right? Maybe I've been watching too many conspiracy movies...but YSR's sudden death DID seem very OUT OF THE BLUE...yea, u skeptics might ask say..."It was an accident, for heaven's sake!"...and I have no answer to that...except...call it a hunch or a woman's intuition or what have u....but do you remember the coverage? It was quite vague...and a minor glitch turned overnight into a tragedy for the state. YSR was supposedly just stranded somewhere...and the next minute, we find out that hez dead!
Then, the making of a martyr begins...blah blah...tussle for CMship between Rosayya and Jagan...and once thatz settled...our noseman, KCR starts fasting...and voila! Fuck up at the centre and the state starts burning. I donno how many of you noticed this, but everything happened quite suddenly in a span of 3 months...one after the other. I havent looked it up, but I heard from loadsa other ppl that KCR did try the fasting trick earlier and no one really bothered...WHY NOW? And a looooooooot of resigning and party-badlofying by all those ministers...jokes about Naidu and KCR NOT expecting an okay from the centre...criticism against Sonia and Chidambaram for being too hasty...and after all this hullabulloo....and now, strong signs of a 'NO' to Telangana from the centre!
And just as that was about to START cooling down, MAYBE....THIS! More property damage and a call for a bandh 2moro. Demands to know about the black box in the chopper...or the voice recording...apparently YSR and pilot in a verbal tussle before death...more rumours and hype. The supposed 'public' (read paid goons) resort to violence and an already volatile situation flares up even more. I'm sure 2moro's news will be full of refutations from the Ambanis...and then, some fart will call for a probe in the state...coz obviously somebody from the state was involved. All the big shots will be implied...I can only think of KCR, Naidu and OBVIOUSLY Jagan himself (my gawd, the sympathy right now could easily win him the CMship). Then, the real mystery will never unfold but fact upon fabricated fact will sensationalize the news even more...and eventually it'll die down...there might be a split and there might be a new CM...or not...but one things for SURE! It'll take the state AGES to recover. Before 2day's new addition, the state has already incurred a loss of 3000+ crores...or so I heard. Hyd is the worst hit, with MNCs and potential foreign investors taking their business elsewhere.
And ultimately, even if the Ambanis are really implicated in the issue...they are definitely going scot free...and once things have calmed down, they'll cover up the losses incurred in the state. The ones who are going to suffer, again, are the common people. Mostly, the lower-end workers in reliance establishments and to a slightly lesser extent, other reliance employees.
Ironically, it is the students who suffer the most in all this. Hotblooded, yes...but that doesnt have to make us stupid. These are all games played by bigshots to mint money...and we, who depend on jobs for our daily bread can hardly afford police records. Wake up, dammit...and please stop ruining public property!!!
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